I will never write the Great American Novel

[psocoptera]

I've never intended to; I don't write novels, I don't even believe The G.A.N. exists. But I will never write the Great American Novel. Nor will I ever see my first paper published, present a poster at my first conference, be addressed as Dr. Sw*ft, or even know how satisfyingly well I did on my comp exams. On the other hand, I'll also never be sitting in the lab again, completely alone, staring at my lab notebook thinking, so should I do it that way or this way? do I need to do that first? where do I even *start*?, having absolutely no one around I can ask, panicking before I've even gotten anywhere knowing I can't possibly get it right without a little guidance I'm just not going to get.

So, you know, it's not without its compensations. And I get a Masters as a consolation prize. And it seems reasonably likely that by the end of the year I'll be somewhere being generally more content and productive, earning a good bit more than I was, grinding my teeth and thinking hateful thoughts as my time and actions are directly controlled by someone else, because apparently I get a choice of extremes, and after three and a half months of silence I finally heard from my advisor, and what I heard was that I'm out. So I don't have that choice any more.

Or, you know, maybe I'll write the Great American Novel or something ::grin::. Teach high school? Proofread textbooks? Anybody need a Master of Biochemistry, good bench skills, excellent written English, creative, quick learner, may think hateful thoughts at you if given too many drop-that-other-thing-and-do-this-now commands but "thrives in a team environment with plenty of communication" or whatever nice spin we're going to try to put on it? Ze dept. head suggested "found I wasn't really interested in basic research", but while I may not actually ever be *engaged* in it again, I'm still quite *interested* in the questions and methods of basic research. Just not in trying to do it in total isolation. I suppose now it is a sort of spectator interest; me and my busted knee will follow the careers of my contemporaries and wonder how it might have been.

I'm totally serious about the job thing, by the way. I don't have any particular plans - I'm open to pursuing anything that sounds interesting.

Comments

[carnap.livejournal.com]

I'm so glad to hear you got the Master's! An advanced scientific degree is a nice consolation prize, as consolation prizes go.

Here's one idea I have for you: you could take the patent bar. You don't need to be a lawyer to take it; you can become a "registered patent agent" if you have sufficient scientific credentials (you're plenty qualified) and pass the exam. You'd need to study the rules of patent procedure, but the exam is open book.

I only learned that there was such a thing as the patent bar two days ago, so I don't know too much about it. But there aren't too many people with the credentials and interest to be patent agents, and you can work a lot of places - law firms, corporations, scientific laboratories, the government.

I don't have the slightest idea whether this would interest you, but it's an idea you probably haven't heard from anyone, so I thought I would throw it out.

[antimony.livejournal.com]

I know some about this, as my dad patents things, and thus deals with patent lawyers. This is a hugely growing field, and one deeply in need of people approaching it from the technical, rather than lawyer, side.
Ditto on the "no idea if you'd like it", but I think you'd be good at it. And it pays nicely, which is a plus.