Fic: Seize The Day

[psocoptera]

I'm participating in a fanfic writing challenge thingy, abc_las, and the first round has finished, so now I'm allowed to repost the story. I would really love feedback on this one from people who haven't watched Huge and don't know much or anything about it; I was trying to write something that would work for people who had never even heard of the show but was still also interesting as fanfic, as a response to the show. It's only about a thousand words long and I won't take offense even if your feedback is just that it was dull, trite, or not to your interest or whatever. (But what I really want to know is if it made no sense without the context of the show, or if there was enough there for it to work.)

Title: Seize The Day
Author: psocoptera
Fandom: Huge
Characters/Pairings: Amber/Ian, Will/Ian
Rating: PG
Wordcount: about 1000
Warnings: none

Seize The Day
(This is a DW post but feel free to comment here if you'd rather. Thanks!)

Comments

[irilyth]

My two cents: There's enough there for the story to make sense, but not enough for it to have a strong emotional hook, without knowing who the characters are, not knowing whether I want to be rooting for Amber/Ian or Will/Ian or Amber/Will or Amber/Will/Ian or what. :^) I liked it, but it didn't make me say "wow, that is so super awesome", and I think that was largely because I didn't have a deep enough image of the characters.

[tapas.livejournal.com]

I largely agree with this, though I was rooting for Will and sympathetic to her as the narrator. (I've never watched Huge and don't know the characters at all, but did know its general setting is a weight loss camp for teenagers.)

[psocoptera.livejournal.com]

Thanks for reading! Huge is all on Hulu if you're ever looking for something to watch while being slept on, or whatever ::grin::.

[psocoptera.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the bits showing Amber and Ian being dysfunctional got cut due to length. I figured it works as a story about Will even if Ian is just some random prize she wins ::grin::. It's not a terribly deep story; if I seriously write Will/Ian someday, no way they're getting together that easily...

terrific

[eastgategirl.livejournal.com]

I don't know what Huge is, so I wasn't familiar with the setting or the characters, but I thought that your story was terrific and easy to follow. It was clear to me that we're supposed to be sympathetic to Will, and I thought that the incident with the milkshake at the diner epitomized the imposition from the outside of a set of rules that demands sublimating, if not crushing and eliminating personal desires. Having just reread 1984, I was hoping for some rebellion from Will. While we didn't quite get that, we did see her beginning to be aware that it is legitimate for her to listen to her heart and to value her own needs and desires.