the littlest hungerstriker

[psocoptera]

Day three of the zero-preschool-intake thing (despite the big-gun temptation of olives and sausage). She was crying "I won't eat or drink! I won't eat or drink!" in the car on the way this morning; I tried to convince her to add "so long as I'm unjustly imprisoned!" but she was having none of it.

This morning was pretty wretched. While she was getting dressed she asked what day it was and I told her Friday and she thought for a minute and started crying and said she wanted to stay home, which, hey, I guess she's getting the days of the week thing down, but, oof. A lot of sorrow and worry at breakfast and after - she kept talking a lot about sleeping at school and I should bring her bed and I should pick her up after nap, which is something we've talked about, that next week I'll be picking her up later - it was hard to tell if she was dreading this or insisting that it happen today. When we got to school she was inconsolable, despite my efforts to interest her in the play kitchen or the water table (exciting pink-dyed water today!). I eventually left her curled up on a pillow sobbing with a book.

After all that, though, maaaaybe a better day than Wednesday; it finally stopped raining, so they were able to go outside, and it sounds like she had fun at the playground, and she said they listened to music and seemed happy about that.

I hope it's going to work out. It occurred to me that if she really just can't adjust and the school advises we pull her out, we would need to be applying *now* for a September 2012 slot, if we wanted her to go somewhere nicer/cheaper/whatever. (She'll have a zillion more options in 2012, past the 2.9 age cutoff; we'd figured we'd keep her at this one for continuity, but if she doesn't actually go this year, that's no longer a consideration.) It feels weird to start pursuing that when things could totally look better in a few weeks, but if in fact things fall through for this year, I would hate to also blow our shot at making something good come out of that.

Comments

[irilyth]

I'm also optimistic that it'll work out, but it occurs to me that if we think that somewhere else would be better for her next year, we could pursue that in any case, regardless of what happens this year.

[prof-fran.livejournal.com]

This is the time to tell this story, I think.

Brynnen was a late talker; at 18 months she had about 2 words (egg and cheese, not mama or papa) though it was clear there were no hearing problems and she understood more. We qualified for home visits with a speech therapist--which she loved--and "Monday school" (mix of kids with developmental delays of various sorts, the theory being to play together and learn from each other). The state van would pick up the two of us and drive us to this great little school where I would sit in the parents room and watch her play through the one way mirror. Except for the first 6 Mondays, I had to wrench the crying child off my legs to leave the room and then watch her cry for two hours before the van came to take us home. The staff would let me come in to calm her down, sometimes just sitting in the room where she could see me, and then I would go and we'd go through it all again. But after about 6 weeks, she got it and started to let go and have fun. (And after 5 months, they kicked her out of the program because she'd learned to talk and she hasn't stopped talking since.)

This is all to say, I know how excruciating it can be to watch your baby struggle like this. The food is clearly about having some control (have you let her pack her own lunch and snack? as a thought). I would say give it some time before you change your minds. Time might be what she needs. But also--know that should you decide to bring her home, that's A right choice and you'll do fine. Best of luck.